Grandma Ila passed away yesterday. She was a beautiful woman and my great friend. I could fill pages recounting our adventures together. Instead, I've included my toast from her 90th birthday party. We love you Grandma.
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I’m John’s youngest daughter Sarah, which I think makes me the 11th grandchild of 13. We have such a great group of friends and family here today, I encourage you to take a moment to look around and admire the mess that my Grandma Ila has created. We’re happy to be here.
Growing up, my Grandma Ila and Grandpa Wayne were as much a part of my life as my parents. I spent many days and nights with them at the Cleaners and up at their house in Lincoln. My Grandma is an incredible combination of old world beliefs and modern sensibility. She is equally comfortable singing and playing Italian music on the organ as she is screaming at the Sacramento Kings and Tiger Woods on TV.
She believes in old wives’ tales. It’s amazing that I’m still alive today when you consider all the times I went out with wet hair against the advice of my Grandma. Equally shocking was that I didn’t die from being a picky eater. Daily she would remind me that I shouldn’t waste food and that Jesus got off a donkey for a crumb of bread. When I wasn’t hungry, she’d tell me, “L’appetito viene quando mangiando.” You’ll get hungry when you eat. Finally, reduced to desperation, I remember one summer she and Grandpa took me to the Mall to get ice cream sundaes. They used to serve them in the mini-baseball helmets. She was so impressed that I ate mine, she ordered us two more and we sat in the sun and devoured them again.
Everyone here knows not to challenge Grandma’s matriarchal rule. There’s one decree: Don’t make Mama mad. She has a great sense of humor with a sharp, biting tongue and she’s not afraid to say what’s on her mind. Honesty is her policy and you probably deserved it. A few years back after Linda was proudly sporting a new haircut, Mama reassured her, “Don’t worry honey, it will grow back.” After watching Laura tap dancing, she delightedly exclaimed, “You’re surprisingly light on your feet!” I’ve been privy to a comment that managed to insult four, “Look at you Sarah, finally one of the butt sisters.”
I should also mention that Grandma has a flair for the dramatic, a trait that just about all of us inherited. Grandma asked me to “take her to Italy one last time before she died”… that was 10 years ago. My cousin Anthony and I toted her around the world, taking turns with rock/paper/scissors to see what we were in charge of… “luggage or Grandma.” I was incredibly blessed to see the small town where she lived, to pick fresh vegetables out of her family garden for dinner, to meet two of her sisters and to see her singing and laughing like she was a young girl again.
Grandma is an incredible example of how to be a strong, smart woman. She spent her years as a young woman moving all over the world and making decisions in the best interests of her children. She was an immigrant, a single mother of four, working six days a week and still managing perfect blond hair and lipstick.
Grandma, you’ve been an incredible role model to me and to your four children, your 13 grandchildren, your 11 great-grandchildren and your great-great-granddaughter. You’re a beautiful woman. I admire your strength and your honesty. Please join me in raising my glass to an incredible friend and role model, “To mama!”
Growing up, my Grandma Ila and Grandpa Wayne were as much a part of my life as my parents. I spent many days and nights with them at the Cleaners and up at their house in Lincoln. My Grandma is an incredible combination of old world beliefs and modern sensibility. She is equally comfortable singing and playing Italian music on the organ as she is screaming at the Sacramento Kings and Tiger Woods on TV.
She believes in old wives’ tales. It’s amazing that I’m still alive today when you consider all the times I went out with wet hair against the advice of my Grandma. Equally shocking was that I didn’t die from being a picky eater. Daily she would remind me that I shouldn’t waste food and that Jesus got off a donkey for a crumb of bread. When I wasn’t hungry, she’d tell me, “L’appetito viene quando mangiando.” You’ll get hungry when you eat. Finally, reduced to desperation, I remember one summer she and Grandpa took me to the Mall to get ice cream sundaes. They used to serve them in the mini-baseball helmets. She was so impressed that I ate mine, she ordered us two more and we sat in the sun and devoured them again.
Everyone here knows not to challenge Grandma’s matriarchal rule. There’s one decree: Don’t make Mama mad. She has a great sense of humor with a sharp, biting tongue and she’s not afraid to say what’s on her mind. Honesty is her policy and you probably deserved it. A few years back after Linda was proudly sporting a new haircut, Mama reassured her, “Don’t worry honey, it will grow back.” After watching Laura tap dancing, she delightedly exclaimed, “You’re surprisingly light on your feet!” I’ve been privy to a comment that managed to insult four, “Look at you Sarah, finally one of the butt sisters.”
I should also mention that Grandma has a flair for the dramatic, a trait that just about all of us inherited. Grandma asked me to “take her to Italy one last time before she died”… that was 10 years ago. My cousin Anthony and I toted her around the world, taking turns with rock/paper/scissors to see what we were in charge of… “luggage or Grandma.” I was incredibly blessed to see the small town where she lived, to pick fresh vegetables out of her family garden for dinner, to meet two of her sisters and to see her singing and laughing like she was a young girl again.
Grandma is an incredible example of how to be a strong, smart woman. She spent her years as a young woman moving all over the world and making decisions in the best interests of her children. She was an immigrant, a single mother of four, working six days a week and still managing perfect blond hair and lipstick.
Grandma, you’ve been an incredible role model to me and to your four children, your 13 grandchildren, your 11 great-grandchildren and your great-great-granddaughter. You’re a beautiful woman. I admire your strength and your honesty. Please join me in raising my glass to an incredible friend and role model, “To mama!”
10 comments:
I am so sorry to read this news, but so glad she had such a long and fulfilling life, and that you two were such good friends. I am thinking of you and your family. I love you!
Sarah, so sorry for your loss. Your grandmother sounds like an amazing woman and the apple didn't fall too far from the tree! Thinking of you.
What a beautiful toast! Thanks for sharing it with those who weren't there to raise our glasses. I can imagine how proud she was that day and many others. XO.
So sorry to hear about your Grandma. What a beautiful toast! She's so proud, I'm sure.
Sarah, I'm so sorry to hear this. But she was an amazing woman... you're lucky to have been shaped by her, and I'm sure she loved every word of this toast!
I'm so sorry to hear of her passing. She was such a VERY special person in your life. What a beautiful piece you wrote...what a wonderful way to keep her memory alive.
I have SUCH PRECIOUS memories with Grandma Ila from when I lived with you - what an AMAZING woman!
That you can write such kind and humorous words about her, your relationship with her and all that you gained from her is indeed a tribute. It is not so sad when a person has lived a long and full life and is remembered so fondly. I remember her spunk and laughter and now EVEN I can make her lasagna. Rest well Grandma Ila.
What a beautiful tribute to your grandma.
We are very sorry for your loss. What a wonderful tribute you gave her - and what a life she lived. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
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